Gratitude

Turns out all we need is love and a little bit of gratitude.

What do people really want

When asked, what do people really want? Some of the responses we get are, a good life, belonging, family, friends, a big house, and then some would simply say, To Be Happy! and often with a big smile on their face. What is it about the word happy, that usually puts a smile on our face? When someone answers they want to be happy, I usually follow up with, what does that mean for you? Usually, people freeze up and struggle to answer the question. Why is happiness so elusive? We like to think that a dream job, a big house, a new car, or that special someone will make us happy. We think this because it’s all around us, in the movies, as you walk past the ads in a department store, and it’s in social media. This idea soon turns into a belief that happiness are the things we surround ourselves with. Steven K. Scott, in his book the Richest Man Who Ever Lived said,

"Happiness is a heart-felt joy that is consistent, persistent, and lasting".

This means that happiness is a feeling, not a car, a house, a girlfriend or a boyfriend, wealth, health, or any other worldly thing. You can have any of those things and still be unhappy. Being happy is what we all work to obtain, but we lose sight of it when the work becomes hard. We must decide to be happy and figure out what that really is for ourselves, then, like a muscle, it must be exercised. For our happiness to be strong it must be worked on every day. This got me thinking about the times I’m most happy and I learned that If I’m grateful, I’ll feel happy. Scott goes’ on to say there are other things that can lead to happiness but being grateful is a huge step in the right direction.

Gratitude VS Thankful

So, let’s talk about gratitude. What is it? Why does it work? Is it thankfulness? Are they the same thing or are they different? When looking up the definitions and studying these words, I couldn’t really find anything that explained the feeling of gratitude. After reading a few articles written by Dr. Robert Emmons, a world-renowned researcher on Gratitude, I learned that thankfulness is an emotion, and gratefulness is an action. Being grateful is a deeper more meaningful form of thankfulness. Think of it this way, being thankful is saying thank you and being grateful is saying it, then spending time to show just how thankful you are. When we do this, we release two neurotransmitters in the brain, (Serotonin and Dopamine) that make us feel lighter and happier causing the moods of anger and worry to dissipate. When we practice this, we start to feel happier and even realize that some of the simplest of things (like a little sister’s birthday) can bring us happiness.

It's home work time baby!

What are you grateful for? Make a list of a few things and write them down at the end of each day. We highly encourage you to start a gratitude journal that keeps a record of all the things you’re grateful for. Then later when you’re feeling down, you can refer to it as it will lift your mood because as Dr. Emmons says,

"We can’t be grateful and envious at the same time".

Here are a few questions to get you started:

1. What have I learned lately that has made me a better person?

2. What has someone done for me recently that I am grateful for?

3. What do I do well today that I wasn’t so good at a year ago?

4. Who do I work that with that makes me feel like I’m going to have a good day? Thank Them!

5. What are my strengths but sometimes forget about?

The idea is to keep asking questions till the answers cause us to act in a grateful manner.

This can be fun so enjoy it!